FAULT LINES MY ASS

I really enjoyed this article. Mostly because of the first tagline;

A senior Iranian cleric says women who wear revealing clothing and behave promiscuously are to blame for earthquakes.

If this was true, L.A. would be under water.

GIANTS BASEBALL IS BACK

All hail the Crazy Crab. Lou Seal can get bent. UUUUUUUUUU RIIIIIIIBE

WISDOM

You know, walk the earth, meet people... get into adventures. Like Caine from "Kung Fu."

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake.

I LOVE HER LAR

Frakken

Frat guy + Mythical sea monster = Frakken

orrrr.....

Clash of the Broseidens

Thanks Joe!

HAPPY ST PATRICKS DAY YA DRUNKS

GOALS AREN'T ALWAYS A GOOD THING

This is DOnna Simpson, and she has a dream. A dream to find a cure for cancer? Perhaps a way to help those with learning disabilities? Nope. Donna wants to be the fattest woman on record. Here is a nice little blurb about her "goal";

Miss Simpson, 42, from New Jersey, USA, already holds the Guinness World Record as the world's biggest mum.

She was 520lbs when she had daughter Jacqueline, three, becoming the largest woman to give birth.

Now she weighs a mega 600lbs, or 43 stone, and hopes to break the 1,000lbs or half a ton mark.

Miss Simpson, who wears XXXXXXXL dresses, eats whole cakes and bags of donuts and tries to move as little as possible.

"I'd love to be 1,000lb," she said.

"It might be hard though. Running after my daughter keeps my weight down."

She runs her own website where people pay to watch her eat, or see her wash her huge body.

The cash helps fund the family's $750 a week food shop, which Miss Simpson carries out in her mobility scooter.

She met her partner Philippe, 49, seven years ago on a dating site for plus-size people.

Philippe, who weighs just 150lbs, is a self-confessed fat admirer, who will only look at a woman if she weighs over 28 stone.

But Miss Simpson, who has an older son Devin, 14, from a previous relationship, insists she's healthy.

"My favourite food is sushi, but unlike others I can sit and eat 70 big pieces of sushi in one go," she said.

"I do love cakes and sweet things, doughnuts are my favourite."

Seriously!?!

RIP COREY FELDMAN

He was absolutely amazing in Rock and Roll High School.