I never know what I want for lunch. I always feel hungry at lunch time but I never really have anything jump out and say “eat me you large female sexual reproductive organ.” I wish food did that, because I would eat that food specifically for its assertiveness. Maybe it’s because I have eaten food that is so exotic everyday normal food seems boring. You try comparing seared griffin meat to a lunchable. There is no comparison. I guess what I am saying is that I would like my own cook. If somebody was making stuff before I had a chance to pick something I am going to eat it. It would also be nice to bring home my kills and have them prepared by a trained professional. I would love to swap recipes for preparing Brontosaurus. Yes, I hunt, kill, and eat dinosaurs. What I really want is to not have to sit here and use up my precious thinking juice (jack daniels) on matters such as this. With my looming presidential campaign and avoiding female rapists daily, I don’t have time for matters such as cooking. Would someone please just help me decide what I want everyday for lunch? I’ll be your best friend.
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