My time in the octagon

I am supposed to write a story based on real life experience. I have so many varied experiences of different exciting things, so it was hard to narrow it down to one. If I had to pick one it would be my time in the octagon. Yes, I have wrestled in the octagon on many occasions. No, I have never lost a single match. I am going to tell what a typical experience in the octagon would be like for myself.

WARNING!!! THIS STORY MAY INTIMIDATE OR POSSIBLY MAKE ONE QUESTION THEIR EXISTENCE.

When my name is introduced over the loud speaker I go into what I call "the bonecrushing zone." I run as fast as I can down to the ring and jump over the eight foot wall. Once inside I do my best not to laugh as my opponent enters the ring. The funny thing about when I fight in the octagon is that once the bell rings I black out and usually come to with someone's lifeless body at my feet. As I exit the ring to cheers I think about my post match ritual. I take my clothes off and jump into a hot bubble bath with a wine cooler. It never fails to follow the same pattern.