Friday, June 05, 2009

Thinking about a new job

I think I would like to start a new job as a wizard or sorcerer. I just don’t have any idea how to get into that profession. I assume the easiest way to start is to buy a lot of bathrobes, a crystal ball and some sort of pointy hat. Then its time to learn how to cast spells or summon things or maybe even get some sort of curse brewing in a cauldron. To be honest, like most things in my life I have committed to something with a minimal amount of thought, but I think I have found a niche here. I just figure that there aren’t many “professional” wizards out there for me to compete with. In the beginning I might do birthdays and old folk’s homes. You know, hone my craft and improve my spells while working with an easily entertained audience. In no time I will graduate to bachelor parties and graduations. Sooner or later I am going to get approached by someone in the entertainment sector and that is going to lay the groundwork for my own daytime talk show. I imagine it would be like Oprah with more magic (if that’s possible!!!). A few years after taking over the industry with my magic and timely wit I will get the primetime new special I have been looking for. That is when I spring my master curse and enslave the 9 million viewers that tuned in to watch me interview Oprah about how she lost it all when some fresh new magical go getter took everything from her. Yeah, I think this might work. Next stop is Walmart for bathrobes.

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