Friday, March 27, 2009

I moonlight at a strip club

I haven’t told many people this but I sometimes moonlight as a bouncer for an all male strip club. It’s called the Cock Factory. I don’t tell people about it because many of my other jobs would probably fire me if they know I was making extra scratch on the side. Another reason I don’t tell a lot of folks is that I have to explain why I would work at an all male club. People always seem to think that because I work in an all male club called the Cock Factory I am gay. Nothing could be further from the truth. I play for one team and one team only. The team that likes to get all types of J’s(HJ, BJ, ZJ) from the ladies. I work as a bouncer at the CF because of the fringe benefits involved.

There are a lot of things about being a straight bouncer at an all male strip club that you wouldn’t normally think of. A few of the better things include;

To say that the atmosphere is electric is an understatement. When Infuego (one of the dancers) comes out to do his fire show you can’t hear yourself think.

Kicking out unruly ladies and gay gentleman for the most part is much easier than dealing with a gang of suit wearing, coked up, mortgage brokers.

Since most of the dancers are gay all of those horny 40-60 year old housewives just fall into one lucky gentleman’s lap. I will give you a clue, it’s me.

Female strip clubs have rules to enforce like no touching the dancers and no masturbating in public. Not so much for the male reviews. Last week I saw a 50 year old Filipino woman give Tex (another dancer) an HJ under the bar. I didn’t have to do a thing about it.

Basically, the job is a total cake walk. I maintain an air of calm that permeates throughout the building. Once in a while you might have to fight a few ladies or escort someone to a taxi after they have overindulged in wine coolers, but that’s part of the job description. I just try to go to work and do my job just like any regular guy.

Check in next week when I interview the Cock Factory’s star performer Lazy Boy. His moves, skill, and raw sexuality will startle you.

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